ELLE WOODS IS SO BOSS

     You know when people tell you sitting on the couch and watching movies is a waste of time? They're absolutely 100% wrong because you can learn EVERYTHING from movies (slightly untrue, but I'm going with it). I first watched Legally Blonde when I was probably ten years-old and of course at the time I was like, ten, and obviously not super aware of what was going on, but I remember liking Elle because she was smart and wore nice clothes. If you haven't seen/read Legally Blonde, for god sakes this is 2014 (I'm not actually mad but you should go watch it), do yourself a favour and open yourself up to POP CULTURE. I just finished watching it and I am so hyped because Elle Woods is a perfect role model and AH I am just so stoked!
     So for all my movie h8ers (I'm just bugging you) in the crowd, here's why this movie is perfect and why I'm, like, convulsing in excitement right now. Elle Woods, played by Reese Witherspoon, is the protagonist and she looks like this:

     Stunning. Now, normally I wouldn't talk about a protagonist's looks but the whole movie is basically about judgy people being super judgy assholes, so I just thought I'd give you that visual for context. Here's a quick summary of the story, then I'll elaborate. Elle is from LA and she's a stereotypical, rich valley girl with amazing manners and gorgeous hair. She falls in love with Warner, who then goes to Harvard and breaks up with Elle. Elle applies to Harvard Law (wow) and goes to get Warner back. After learning that Warner has a new not-so-nice fiancé at Harvard, Elle is crushed, gets her nails done, makes friends with her manicurist, and then continues to fight for Warner. After learning that Warner thinks she's stupid, Elle is determined to kick ass and she does. She gets an internship under one of her professors and works really, really hard. After this professor makes a pass at Elle (gross), she second guesses herself and almost gives up. But she comes back, gets this professor fired, takes his position and continues to, once again, kick ass. Now, let me begin.

     Elle was in a sorority in LA. She references it often and you can tell that it's something she really cares about. Throughout the movie, it's apparent that her passion for sisterhood extends past the walls of the sorority house. To begin with, she makes friends with her manicurist, Paulette Bonafonte, almost immediately (they bond over getting their hearts broken, but a) who doesn't? and b) Hollywood can't give us everything we want yet). She helps Paulette to take control of her sexuality and what she wants by teaching her the infamous "bend and snap". Elle and Paulette become really close and Elle is always there for her. Another example of Elle's commitment to her sisters happens with her client. Belonging to the same sorority as Elle, the client told Elle her alibi but made her promise not to tell anyone else. Even though the case could've been easily solved with the alibi, Elle kept her promise and solved the case without it, proving that she's an awesome person and also a really good lawyer. The final example of Elle being amazing comes from her interactions with Warner's new fiancé. At first, Elle is curt and unpleasant because of the classic patriarchal competition between women over men (gag) but as time progresses and Elle begins to focus more on her work, their differences kind of disappear and they become friends. Overall, Elle is just being a really fucking nice person to almost everyone she comes into contact with. She creates bonds really fast and stays true to what she says, and I think that is so admirable. 

     Elle also doesn't take any shit whatsoever and I think that is sooooo underrated. We grow up being taught to be nice to everyone and have manners, and Elle portrays that really well, as I've just discussed. She's nice to everyone except for people who fuck her over, and that's something that a lot of people, including myself are missing in their lives. Of course it's important to be kind to people, but it's equally as important to stand up for yourself when people take advantage of/walk all over you. After Warner tells Elle that she "isn't smart enough", she proves him wrong. And when he tries to get her back, she calls him a "bonehead" and moves on. THANK YOU ELLE WOODS for responding to an awful comment with productivity and self-respect. There is nothing better than that. Elle takes it to the next level when she gets her boss fired. All she had to do was tell her friends what he did to her, they supported her and helped her, and she ended up taking his place. She thought about running away but she didn't and that is so powerful. If Legally Blonde teaches you nothing else, please just take from it that it is possible to handle shitty people in a mature and responsible way (i.e. "bonehead) and move on with your life instead of carrying on anger that could have been dealt with immediately.

     At the end of the movie, Elle gives a speech. In it she says two things that really stuck out to me: "Remember that first impressions are not always correct" and "YOU MUST HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF".  This first impressions business could literally translate to any person you meet in the whole world. DO NOT JUDGE PEOPLE. It is so ignorant and ridiculous to think that you know a person without even trying to see who they really are. We're all guilty of doing this at some point, I'm sure, but it is so BAD. And finally, having faith in yourself is the single best thing a person can do. Being nice, having friends, loving others, respecting others; those are all important things, but doing what you need to do to be happy is number one, always. That's what I believe anyways. It is okay to be confident, to love yourself, and to respect yourself. There is nothing wrong with that and anyone who tries to make you feel differently deserves to be called a bonehead, big time.

     Elle Woods is everything that I want my future daughter to see. Yes, she exemplifies completely every one of those stupid white girl stereotypes that are so famously talked about on the internet right now, but christ, that whole "white girls like pumpkin spice lattes and UGGs" thing is so racist. It's important to acknowledge that Elle is obviously privileged but she faces a lot of struggles and sees them through, female jealousy and sexual assault included, and things like these most likely stem from being a woman, not from being white. Stereotypes aside (as they should be - always), I think Elle is a perfect role model. She knows that she loves reading Cosmopolitan and getting her nails done and she knows just because she wants to be taken seriously as a lawyer doesn't mean she has to sacrifice any part of herself. She knows and understands completely that men are not entitled to her body, but she also isn't scared to express her sexuality in ways that she feels comfortable doing. She respects people always, no matter how different they are from her. She knows herself and knows what she wants and it is so damn INSPIRING. 

     All I have left to say is just go watch this movie so maybe all of my rambles will make sense. ELLE 4 PREZ. Goodnight.

Hypothetically, Would You Be Friends With You?

     Hi. So, I'm not even slightly close to being in school yet and I'm already balls deep in stress.
I have to make a "confirmation deposit" of $175 so all of my classes in my schedule don't get wiped off the face of the planet. BECAUSE THAT'S SO FAIR AND STUDENTS TOTALLY DEFINITELY HAVE AN EXTRA $175. Obviously, I'm mad about this. Deep breaths and donuts though, amirite?
     In other news, I'd like to do a person of the week post. This one goes out to my home girl Jenna Marbles. Jenna recently posted a video on being yourself:

http://youtu.be/6xx_pwu7n-Y

     Now, whether or not you watched that video, I'm going to tell you why it touched my heart. Jenna is one of the most confident, bad ass bitches in the world. I don't always agree with everything she says, but that doesn't make me like her any less. I think disagreeing with people is important in friendships and Jenna Marbles and I are suuuper close friends, so... (I'm lying). The reason Jenna's video touched me so much is because I'm going through this "being yourself" thing in my life right now. Not the whole "discovering-who-I-am-and-writing-terrible-semi-suicidal-song-lyrics-about-what-my-heart-is-truly-trying-to-tell-me-and-eating-ice-cream-for-every-meal" kind of struggle. I never really did exactly that when I was confused about who I was and I don't know why I pulled that scenario out of space, but I feel like everyone has different versions of that whole semi-psychotic phase at some point and maybe one person did that somewhere in time...? I'm not a focused human. Anyways, the struggle that I'm dealing with right now is persevering with my notion of who I am and sticking to my guns, even if people don't like it, if that makes sense. In the video, Jenna talks about how you know that you're truly being yourself when you're the loneliest you've ever been (or something along those lines) because you're at a point where you've completely accepted who you are and, probably, who you are might be a hard thing for others to accept sometimes. AND THAT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE. And the fact that Jenna Marbles is so confident and cool and is also super lonely like me, makes me feel really comforted. Before I get started on this, I don't mean to say that I don't have incredible friends, because I really, really do. I have wonderful friends who accept me and love me and I'm beyond grateful for that. My thing is, though, that I have a hard time being who others (society) expect me (and every other human in the world) to be (robotically polite and perfect in social situations), and that usually results in weird interactions or, like, no interactions at all with the majority of the human race. Holla if I'm not making any sense (and by holla, I mean comment below and I'll try to explain myself more thoroughly). I know a lot of people who are incredibly personable and nice and can strike up a conversation with anyone in any situation, and everyone loves these people - heck, I love these people! - and I always thought, "Shit, why don't people feel as comfortable around me as they do around these people?" And then I realized it's because I'm being myself. That's not to say that these people aren't being themselves - I'm sure they are - but a bubbly, personable, talkative, flamboyant Jenelle is just not something that you'll find under my sexy, but tough exterior. And this video made me realize that that's okay! And that's why I'm lonely! Because I'm being myself! And then I felt so relieved! I really don't want people to read this and be like, "Shit, I think Jenelle might be kind of dumb. It took her watching a Jenna Marbles video to make her realize it's okay to be herself? Yikes, I should not read this blog." Don't think this. Have you ever been walking down the sidewalk, just hating life in general, kicking sticks and rocks around and junk, and then you saw a rainbow, or a duck with baby ducks, or a really cute kitten, or a butterfly on a flower, and then you were like, "Man, life can be kind of beautiful sometimes. Maybe I shouldn't be such a heartless plug."? That's kinda what happened to me in this situation, and I am so thankful that it did. It was a wake-up call of sorts. I don't know when I started getting so personal in these blog posts and I sincerely hope it isn't scaring people off, but I'm not really intent on stopping. I feel so lucky to have the group of friends that I have now, because I don't feel, not even a tiny little bit, like I'm lying about who I am, and they love me anyway. And I am so excited for every single person in the world to reach the point where they feel as content as I do for this reason alone - that people love me because of exactly who I am and I don't have to pretend at all to be anything I'm not. 

     I, Jenelle Dufva, am terrible at small talk, disgustingly unorganized, incredibly witty, fairly book smart, bad at making friends, good at spending money on shoes, super supportive of my sisters, completely void of leadership skills, potentially hypocritical, very granola, and fierce as fuck. I'm lonely sometimes, but most of the time I'm not, because I've got my really great friends who love me and I've got myself. And I think that's pretty cool.  

Watch Your Sisters' Backs, Sisters.

     Hi!
     If you are a male, you may see this as being aimed more towards women, but it's totally relevant to you as well. Just translate the stereotypes into ones that you have been personally affected by and it'll all make perfect sense.
     It was recently drawn to my attention by my favourite Instagram account that sometimes, I have misogynist tendencies.

*gasp* 

   
     "Well, Jenelle! How could you have misogynist tendencies? You are obviously so feminist!" said the beautiful blog reader who actually reads this blog and who Jenelle so deeply appreciates. You're right, reader. I am really feminist, obviously. But there's something that all girls deal with that I'd never really thought of as misogyny, just the truth, and it's terrible! It's so upsetting that this idea is so completely accepted by women. Before I get ahead of myself, though, let me explain what I mean.
     Girls, please picture the following scenario:
   
     Gossipy girl whom no one likes says: "Oh my gosh, did you see what [insert name here] was doing with [insert name here]? I can't believe they did that!"

     Boy whom is sexually attractive to you overhears gossipy girl and says to you: "Ugh, I hate it when girls gossip like that."

     You: "I know, right? I hate girls. I'm so not like all of those other bitches. That's why I'm only friends with boys."

     Okay, so maybe your scenario went a little differently and a few words were swapped around here and there, but you catch my drift, right? Every single woman has been in this situation before. And honestly, before it was seriously brought to my attention, I'd never thought about the effect this might have on society. I will now explain, first of all, why this happens and secondly, why it's so harmful.
     I don't care who you are, what you do, or what you think you do, every single person in the world wants to be seen as an individual. And that's completely understandable! That's definitely something that is important to me. I don't want to blend in with the crowd or whatever. The problem with this is that sometimes, to make themselves seem more likeable and more unique, people throw others under the bus. And that's what's happening in this situation. If someone says something negative about a group of people that you belong to, obviously you're going to try your best to stand out from that group so that you, as an individual, aren't seen in the same negative light. In this really difficult situation, women are putting their sisters down in an attempt to seem cool, basically. They want attention, and recognition for being nice, not gossipy, not catty, etc. and in doing this, they, without even thinking about it, undermine the kindness and respectfulness of other women that also don't fit into this terrible stereotype.
     Now, the reason why this is so harmful should be pretty apparent already. Women have to put up with so much shit from every angle, at all times, every day of their lives. And now, with these kind of situations, not only do they have to deal with being called bitches, being stared at, being objectified, being at the receiving end of never ending sexist jokes, now they have to deal with their sisters, their fellow women, putting them down as well. There's already enough hate built up against us, ladies. We don't need to make more by agreeing with people about these stereotypes! Not all women like to gossip or read magazines. Some do, and that's fine, but not all. It's so important to understand that equality is equality in every sense. I can't believe that I didn't see how awful I was being when I agreed with people on these points. I know a lot of women that do these things, some of whom I like and some of whom I don't. And that's okay, because the way that they act isn't my problem and I shouldn't be making it my problem. People should be able to be free and not have to worry about stereotypes of any kind. Especially women, guys. Come on. Women are so fucking oppressed already. We don't need this. We don't need it from men and we REALLY don't need it from women.
     So, this is me apologizing to all of the women that I've ever mindlessly stereotyped because I wanted people to think that I was cool. I'm really, really sorry. Every woman is beautiful and intelligent in her own right and it's not okay to put us all into one big box. The individuality and respect of every woman is way more important to me than how others view me. Even if they are attractive men.
     What I'm getting down to here is, the next time you try to break free of stereotypes, break free hard, girl! But leave us other women out of it, okay? We're all individuals too and we deserve recognition for that.
     

The Definition of Activism: Malala Yousafzai.

     On October 9, Malala Yousafzai, an activist for the rights of women and education, was shot in the head and neck by a Taliban soldier on her way home from school. She's fifteen-years old.
     There's really nothing to say except that I'm absolutely amazed. I'm so amazed that someone so young can be so strong and ready to put her life on the line for something she believes in. I've talked about Greenpeace in the past and how all of the people on the Sea Shepherd are putting their lives in danger every day for something they believe in, and it's incredible! But these people are mostly middle-aged and they've had a lot of time to develop their ideas and prepare themselves for the consequences that may come as a result of their actions. And I definitely don't mean to belittle their actions by talking about their age. They're still doing amazing things and I will always commend them for that.
     But, Malala. She's fifteen! I personally don't know any fifteen-year old that knows exactly what she believes in and puts her whole being into that purpose. I honestly don't know any fifteen-year old that believes in anything 100%. She's barely had the time to develop her beliefs (I know this because I've barely had any time to develop mine), she's just doing what she knows is right and I can't think of anything more incredible than that.I can't believe the bravery and courage it must take her every day to wake up, knowing full well that she could be attacked at any moment, and still standing tall with her head held high, fighting her cause with everything she is.
     Malala is so strong and important and rebellious that the whole entirety of the Taliban can't handle her bravery. They were scared of this fifteen-year old girl. In their eyes, this little girl was winning and they had to eliminate her. She was winning! Can you believe that? She is so strong that she made the Taliban uncomfortable. Because of their fear, the Taliban has vowed that if she makes a recovery, they won't hesitate to kill her.
     I'm ashamed of myself. I know I have a lot of time to develop my beliefs, go to school and make a change, but I feel like that's not an excuse. Maybe Malala acted so soon in her life simply because she thought she didn't have much time. Or maybe she just loved school more than anything and felt that the opportunity of education for children in her country was more important than her safety. Either way, I'm ashamed of the fact that I live in Canada, said by many to be the safest place on Earth, and I haven't done anything. I haven't sacrificed anything. I haven't exercised my rights to free speech the way I should be, I haven't written Stephen Harper a letter telling him how thoroughly I despise him, I haven't protested in front of the Legislative Building to let them know how much I disagree with the lack of transparency in our government, and the list goes on. I feel that I'm taking advantage of my situation. Like, I'm just sitting here, complaining about everything and not taking any action. And I'm ashamed.
     I hate that it's taken something so drastic happening to someone so fragile for me to realize the action I need to take. Because of Malala, I vow to do more. I vow to do as much as I possibly can. I feel that I owe it to her to stand up for what I believe in.
     This post may not seem very structured or anything, but the reason I wrote it was to simply say: Thank you, Malala for your unbelievable sacrifice. I've never been more in awe of someone than I am of you right now. You understand what it means to follow your dreams and do what you believe in. Thank you for speaking for those who cannot speak for themselves. Everyone should be more like you.