Friday, 19 September 2014

WHAT AM I DOING

     Hellooooo world! This blog is getting a little dusty, so I thought I'd clean the thing off and start over fresh. I sincerely hope that everyone is doing well. I can't believe how much I miss writing this thing. I just read over a few of my past entries and realized that I have a sense of humour (????) and I think it's been missing in my other writing, so I'm gonna try to get it back. In case you're wondering what I mean by other writing (I'm sure you're all on the edge of your seats), I've been writing a weekly article for an online newspaper that was started in my hometown! My article is supposed to be focused on issues that affect people my age. It's such a great opportunity and I'm so grateful to my lovely friend who passed this article on to me (<3). Here's a thing, though. I have SO MUCH to say in this article. I could write about so many THINGS, but only theoretically. Realistically, I'm terrified of writing anything because I feel like it won't reach the audience I'm writing for. This blog is easy. I pick something that's pissing me off, I write a huge fucking paragraph on it (for some reason I don't believe in formatting) and then my friends read it and they can relate to it. I'm writing for people my age on here, so everything I'm saying is going to make sense. I don't know how to write my ideas to an audience that doesn't come from the same generation as me. Here are some things that I'm worried about: A) offending people. A lot of the things I have to say have to do with the generational gap between people my age and people older than myself, but how the hell do you just be like, "Oh hey, by the way I disagree with mostly everything your generation believes aaaand here's how to be better, peace." I can't do that at all, because it's terrible. I guess part of writing this article is learning how to get better at communicating my ideas to people who aren't like me  (underlined passage is, like, the meaning of life) but I'm just having a hard time right now with this so that's why I'm complaining. B) I'm having a hard time feeling like myself in my writing and feeling like I can be honest about what I think. For example, I want to write about how uncomfortable I feel in my work place sometimes because of the amount of not so appropriate remarks/looks my co-workers and I receive from older men. Normally, I would rage hard about this on my blog, fairly confident that none of these guys would ever find it. I can't do that in the paper because they all read it. It's probably a good thing that they'd see it, but stirring up shit in my work place is not something I need in my life even though my heart KNOWS IT HAS TO BE DONE. Please comment and tell me if this is okay, but I'm thinking of using the whole "I have a friend who's uncomfortable at work because..." approach? I don't know if that's wrong or if it's just me being strategic? Some advice would be helpful. Also, I'm worried about scaring people in this town, guys. I need to write about patriarchy in this article, but a few weeks ago I wrote about piercings and tattoos and that scared people! This is small town Alberta and I have the worst writer's block I think I've ever had! I think I'm having a hard time figuring out the difference between being a professional and changing who I am to make other people happy. I don't think I should have to change anything at all, but I just really don't want to lose this opportunity by saying the wrong thing. (Even though I probably don't,) I feel like I have a lot of pull in my community with this and I want to be the best I can be for the people reading what I have to say. This is one of those things that I really need some advice on. If you guys can comment and say whether or not you think I'm crazy for worrying or if you have any ideas for stuff I should be writing on, that would be so so so appreciated. I plan on writing some pretty meaty things in here in the near future, so stay tuned. Ciao!

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