ELLE WOODS IS SO BOSS

     You know when people tell you sitting on the couch and watching movies is a waste of time? They're absolutely 100% wrong because you can learn EVERYTHING from movies (slightly untrue, but I'm going with it). I first watched Legally Blonde when I was probably ten years-old and of course at the time I was like, ten, and obviously not super aware of what was going on, but I remember liking Elle because she was smart and wore nice clothes. If you haven't seen/read Legally Blonde, for god sakes this is 2014 (I'm not actually mad but you should go watch it), do yourself a favour and open yourself up to POP CULTURE. I just finished watching it and I am so hyped because Elle Woods is a perfect role model and AH I am just so stoked!
     So for all my movie h8ers (I'm just bugging you) in the crowd, here's why this movie is perfect and why I'm, like, convulsing in excitement right now. Elle Woods, played by Reese Witherspoon, is the protagonist and she looks like this:

     Stunning. Now, normally I wouldn't talk about a protagonist's looks but the whole movie is basically about judgy people being super judgy assholes, so I just thought I'd give you that visual for context. Here's a quick summary of the story, then I'll elaborate. Elle is from LA and she's a stereotypical, rich valley girl with amazing manners and gorgeous hair. She falls in love with Warner, who then goes to Harvard and breaks up with Elle. Elle applies to Harvard Law (wow) and goes to get Warner back. After learning that Warner has a new not-so-nice fiancé at Harvard, Elle is crushed, gets her nails done, makes friends with her manicurist, and then continues to fight for Warner. After learning that Warner thinks she's stupid, Elle is determined to kick ass and she does. She gets an internship under one of her professors and works really, really hard. After this professor makes a pass at Elle (gross), she second guesses herself and almost gives up. But she comes back, gets this professor fired, takes his position and continues to, once again, kick ass. Now, let me begin.

     Elle was in a sorority in LA. She references it often and you can tell that it's something she really cares about. Throughout the movie, it's apparent that her passion for sisterhood extends past the walls of the sorority house. To begin with, she makes friends with her manicurist, Paulette Bonafonte, almost immediately (they bond over getting their hearts broken, but a) who doesn't? and b) Hollywood can't give us everything we want yet). She helps Paulette to take control of her sexuality and what she wants by teaching her the infamous "bend and snap". Elle and Paulette become really close and Elle is always there for her. Another example of Elle's commitment to her sisters happens with her client. Belonging to the same sorority as Elle, the client told Elle her alibi but made her promise not to tell anyone else. Even though the case could've been easily solved with the alibi, Elle kept her promise and solved the case without it, proving that she's an awesome person and also a really good lawyer. The final example of Elle being amazing comes from her interactions with Warner's new fiancé. At first, Elle is curt and unpleasant because of the classic patriarchal competition between women over men (gag) but as time progresses and Elle begins to focus more on her work, their differences kind of disappear and they become friends. Overall, Elle is just being a really fucking nice person to almost everyone she comes into contact with. She creates bonds really fast and stays true to what she says, and I think that is so admirable. 

     Elle also doesn't take any shit whatsoever and I think that is sooooo underrated. We grow up being taught to be nice to everyone and have manners, and Elle portrays that really well, as I've just discussed. She's nice to everyone except for people who fuck her over, and that's something that a lot of people, including myself are missing in their lives. Of course it's important to be kind to people, but it's equally as important to stand up for yourself when people take advantage of/walk all over you. After Warner tells Elle that she "isn't smart enough", she proves him wrong. And when he tries to get her back, she calls him a "bonehead" and moves on. THANK YOU ELLE WOODS for responding to an awful comment with productivity and self-respect. There is nothing better than that. Elle takes it to the next level when she gets her boss fired. All she had to do was tell her friends what he did to her, they supported her and helped her, and she ended up taking his place. She thought about running away but she didn't and that is so powerful. If Legally Blonde teaches you nothing else, please just take from it that it is possible to handle shitty people in a mature and responsible way (i.e. "bonehead) and move on with your life instead of carrying on anger that could have been dealt with immediately.

     At the end of the movie, Elle gives a speech. In it she says two things that really stuck out to me: "Remember that first impressions are not always correct" and "YOU MUST HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF".  This first impressions business could literally translate to any person you meet in the whole world. DO NOT JUDGE PEOPLE. It is so ignorant and ridiculous to think that you know a person without even trying to see who they really are. We're all guilty of doing this at some point, I'm sure, but it is so BAD. And finally, having faith in yourself is the single best thing a person can do. Being nice, having friends, loving others, respecting others; those are all important things, but doing what you need to do to be happy is number one, always. That's what I believe anyways. It is okay to be confident, to love yourself, and to respect yourself. There is nothing wrong with that and anyone who tries to make you feel differently deserves to be called a bonehead, big time.

     Elle Woods is everything that I want my future daughter to see. Yes, she exemplifies completely every one of those stupid white girl stereotypes that are so famously talked about on the internet right now, but christ, that whole "white girls like pumpkin spice lattes and UGGs" thing is so racist. It's important to acknowledge that Elle is obviously privileged but she faces a lot of struggles and sees them through, female jealousy and sexual assault included, and things like these most likely stem from being a woman, not from being white. Stereotypes aside (as they should be - always), I think Elle is a perfect role model. She knows that she loves reading Cosmopolitan and getting her nails done and she knows just because she wants to be taken seriously as a lawyer doesn't mean she has to sacrifice any part of herself. She knows and understands completely that men are not entitled to her body, but she also isn't scared to express her sexuality in ways that she feels comfortable doing. She respects people always, no matter how different they are from her. She knows herself and knows what she wants and it is so damn INSPIRING. 

     All I have left to say is just go watch this movie so maybe all of my rambles will make sense. ELLE 4 PREZ. Goodnight.

WHAT AM I DOING

     Hellooooo world! This blog is getting a little dusty, so I thought I'd clean the thing off and start over fresh. I sincerely hope that everyone is doing well. I can't believe how much I miss writing this thing. I just read over a few of my past entries and realized that I have a sense of humour (????) and I think it's been missing in my other writing, so I'm gonna try to get it back. In case you're wondering what I mean by other writing (I'm sure you're all on the edge of your seats), I've been writing a weekly article for an online newspaper that was started in my hometown! My article is supposed to be focused on issues that affect people my age. It's such a great opportunity and I'm so grateful to my lovely friend who passed this article on to me (<3). Here's a thing, though. I have SO MUCH to say in this article. I could write about so many THINGS, but only theoretically. Realistically, I'm terrified of writing anything because I feel like it won't reach the audience I'm writing for. This blog is easy. I pick something that's pissing me off, I write a huge fucking paragraph on it (for some reason I don't believe in formatting) and then my friends read it and they can relate to it. I'm writing for people my age on here, so everything I'm saying is going to make sense. I don't know how to write my ideas to an audience that doesn't come from the same generation as me. Here are some things that I'm worried about: A) offending people. A lot of the things I have to say have to do with the generational gap between people my age and people older than myself, but how the hell do you just be like, "Oh hey, by the way I disagree with mostly everything your generation believes aaaand here's how to be better, peace." I can't do that at all, because it's terrible. I guess part of writing this article is learning how to get better at communicating my ideas to people who aren't like me  (underlined passage is, like, the meaning of life) but I'm just having a hard time right now with this so that's why I'm complaining. B) I'm having a hard time feeling like myself in my writing and feeling like I can be honest about what I think. For example, I want to write about how uncomfortable I feel in my work place sometimes because of the amount of not so appropriate remarks/looks my co-workers and I receive from older men. Normally, I would rage hard about this on my blog, fairly confident that none of these guys would ever find it. I can't do that in the paper because they all read it. It's probably a good thing that they'd see it, but stirring up shit in my work place is not something I need in my life even though my heart KNOWS IT HAS TO BE DONE. Please comment and tell me if this is okay, but I'm thinking of using the whole "I have a friend who's uncomfortable at work because..." approach? I don't know if that's wrong or if it's just me being strategic? Some advice would be helpful. Also, I'm worried about scaring people in this town, guys. I need to write about patriarchy in this article, but a few weeks ago I wrote about piercings and tattoos and that scared people! This is small town Alberta and I have the worst writer's block I think I've ever had! I think I'm having a hard time figuring out the difference between being a professional and changing who I am to make other people happy. I don't think I should have to change anything at all, but I just really don't want to lose this opportunity by saying the wrong thing. (Even though I probably don't,) I feel like I have a lot of pull in my community with this and I want to be the best I can be for the people reading what I have to say. This is one of those things that I really need some advice on. If you guys can comment and say whether or not you think I'm crazy for worrying or if you have any ideas for stuff I should be writing on, that would be so so so appreciated. I plan on writing some pretty meaty things in here in the near future, so stay tuned. Ciao!

A Bloody Travesty.

     I wasn't going to write this post because, honestly, it's exhausting for me to constantly talk about things that I want to change. Worth it, definitely, but exhausting. And part of me feels like someone is going to read that and say, "Well, this is gonna be another episode of 'Angry Things Jenelle Says' so guess what I'm NOT reading right now" and that's cool. But I'm not angry about this - actually, it's more of a positivity thing, so stick around. I might just impress you with my ability to do positive things! +! (I'm tired and that's almost funny so I'm leaving it there.)

     I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that what I did today was an act against the patriarchy. *cue patriarchy-crushing, egotistical hair toss over shoulder motion*

     About an hour ago, after a long day of doing lots of different stuff and menstruating while doing so (which makes everything a thousand times more frustrating and exhausting), I had to go buy "feminine hygiene products" (cute name for it, hey?). So, here I am in the drug store trying to find the cheapest tampons possible and wondering if maybe I should buy liners as well. The first thing that went through my mind after I considered buying both was, "Man, that's going to make me look so gross." And after realizing that that, the way that I was going to look carrying two boxes instead of one, was more important to me than my own personal comfort while my body goes through its cycles actually made me stop and say out loud, "Ohhh wow that's dumb." So, I grabbed two boxes.
     This particular story is no indication of how all menstruating women feel when they have to buy "feminine hygiene products", so if you're completely comfortable with your body and its cycles and the way society views that, then THANK YOU. But if you're like me and you got sucked into this poisonous vortex of negative connotations having to do with one of the most natural things a person's body is CAPABLE OF, then this is a blog post for you. Personally (I know a lot of other peoples' negative experiences start before this), this fear of my own reproductive organs started when girls and boys were separated in sexual education in junior high. I didn't know what a wet dream was until I was probably sixteen years-old and I'm sure a lot of men who don't menstruate didn't know what a tampon looked like (save those commercials that make them look like dresses or skirts or whatever (WHY).....) either. A) What's the point of that besides trying to keep "mystery" that the opposite sex is supposed to have based on a constructed societal need for a heteronormative male to female romance? B) How is anyone supposed to feel comfortable with the opposite sex in an intimate situation when the fucking PURPOSE of their reproductive organs is not even clear?? I'm a grown ass woman and I was worried about not hiding my tampons and liners because of what people would think of me buying two boxes of a product that's created to hide my reproductive cycles. WHY are we hiding from people? I don't understand why it's necessary for us, in the 21st century, to keep doing this to ourselves. It makes me really upset that some people reading this are going to be uncomfortable and wonder why I would talk about this on the internet. Honestly, I'm sorry that society made you uncomfortable with this because it's not just you, it's me too. I had to convince myself that it was okay to buy products for the functions of my own body because I've been taught to be ashamed of how my own body works.
     Also, even the placement of these products in stores is silly. At the one I went to today, this stuff was on the second floor of a drug store tucked away in the very middle aisle. Rude. One of those little boxes by the cash register full of tampons instead of chocolate bars would be a fucking godsend.
     Mostly, my thing with this is that something like menstruation does not have to be a secret from anyone, especially yourself. If you're a non-menstruating man and you have questions about menstruation or anything, ask someone and don't be afraid to. Ask your girlfriend or mom or me, even, if you want. And if you're a menstruating woman, don't be a meanie, okay? Don't say stuff like, "Ugh, you don't even understand what it's like." Because you're obviously right, a lot of men don't know what it's like, so you don't have to say that. If you want to be understood instead of having people listen to dumb weird myths about menstrual blood and what it even is, be willing to answer questions about it. Being elitist with anything, especially something so damn natural and lovely is just hurting yourself and those around you. Let people know what's up with your cycle, girl.
     The moral of this story is to respect yourself and love what your body can do. Some day that weirdo menstrual stuff might give you a baby, and how cool would that be? Get comfortable with you and your body and be good to yourself and get TWO BOXES. You deserve two boxes. Goodnight.

Whatever: A Short Analysis Of The Selfie.

     Warning: I use "they" to describe specific individuals because it's gender inclusive. If you're really serious about traditional grammar, brace yourself. 

     The time has come to talk about it: the dreaded selfie! If you've never seen a selfie before (a.k.a you've been living under a rock void of any internet usage) here are some examples: 

Me being Justin Timberlake.

Justin Timberlake being a better Justin Timberlake than me. #notbitter

Meryl Streep and Hilary Clinton being undeniably cool.

Rihanna lookin' fabulous.

James Franco being patriotic (and so cute hehehe).

Miley bein' Miley.

     So, there you have it. A whole bunch of celebrities and me and the infamous selfie. In our society today, the selfie is pretty normal. Most people in most places are taking selfies most of the time and for some reason, people have a lot to say about it. There are a few different points of view I've heard people take on this pressing issue and I'd like to talk about that, and then I'd like to talk about how I feel about selfies. So here we go:

1. People believe that many people take selfies to A) make themselves look better than they actually do in real life by using editing software, and B) get confirmation from other people that they're good looking. To all of you who feel this way, that's neat. It's cool that you have an opinion on selfies, I guess. If you don't like them, that's okay. The thing that I don't like about this point of view is that it inherently has a shitload of judgement embedded in it a lot of the time. Let's start with Part A): peeps have a problem with filters. Okay cool, but tell me, please: what's the difference between a person putting a filter on a picture and a person putting make up on their face? Both alter the appearance and both are put there because the person in charge of the subject (a.k.a THEMSELVES) wants it there. To this, the person holding this point of view may say something along the lines of "Yeah, and isn't it terrible that people think they look better that way?" And my answer to you is no. Because who are you to judge what a person does to THEIR OWN PERSON. They are an independent human being with thoughts and feelings and they probably put a lot of effort into this photo. Filters on photos and make up on faces are both artistic outlets. Sure, you can say that they're superficial and you would never do such a thing yourself, and that's okay FOR YOU but people should be allowed to do whatever they want with themselves without your judgement. So save your "Awe, this poor girl is so insecure she feels the need to post a photo of herself with all of this make up and all of these filters just to feel like she's pretty boo hoo hoo" for your own brain and your own Instagram account and your own face. People should be free to express themselves in whatever way they feel most comfortable and it's okay to say you don't like that for YOU and you only, not for them. Part B): the confirmation issue. I've heard this said more than is acceptable. "The only reason people take selfies is for confirmation from people that they're attractive." And you know, a lot of people probably do take selfies for that reason. Maybe they only get "likes" on photos and no compliments in real life interactions and these "likes" make up for their lack of attention from people. I don't know that for sure, but I know why I take selfies and I'll share that with you. I take selfies because I think it's entertaining. I take selfies because I like to write stupid captions underneath my photos on Instagram. I take selfies on days when I feel like I look really nice and maybe I want other people to see how cool my eyebrows look. I take selfies because I get bored when I'm alone all the time. But mostly, I take selfies for memories and I think that's something that really gets me about people hating on selfies all the time. My opponents reading this are probably like, "What? You like to remember how your own face looked on a certain day?" And my answer to you is yes, opponent. Sometimes my lipstick looks nice and I want to remember that. Me taking a photo of my face is not a political statement (it can be though - I'll get to that later), it's a simple photo that I wanted to put on the internet for that reason, and for that reason alone - because I wanted to. And that should be okay because it isn't up to anyone else to decide what I put on the internet. It's my decision. I think that the "daily selfie" could be a really beautiful thing if people would just give it a chance. Having an image that represents a day that you had could be the only physical "souvenir", if you will, from that day, and I think that's pretty cool. So, what I'm saying with this particular point of view is that yeah, a lot of people take selfies to feel better about themselves, to show everyone their cool outfit that day, to make memories with their friends, and that's fine. If you don't wanna selfie, you don't gotta selfie. But don't judge people that do because it's just a fucking PHOTO and it's not your life.  

     Also, as I kind of mentioned already, selfies can function as more than photos. On January 23rd, 2014 the Instagram community started a hashtag movement: "#fuckyouputin". Basically, the idea is to post a selfie on Instagram with a middle finger raised showing Vladimir Putin that a lot of people in the world don't agree with the way he's been treating citizens of Russia. If you're able to go on Instagram, search that hashtag. I don't want to say thousands because I'm not sure, but definitely hundreds of people uploaded photos with their middle fingers raised and it's pretty powerful. There was also a picture of a t-shirt that said "Putin, you can't sit with us", which I thought was really funny, but that's beside the point. What I'm saying is, yeah, selfies can be annoying and they probably make up a lot of what's on your news feed every day, but they can also do cool things. I'm not saying you should go take a selfie because it'll change the world or anything like that, I just think it's interesting. 

     I promised my opinion on selfies earlier, so here it is: I like them. I like taking them and I like looking at them. They can be super funny but also artistic, and I like that. But mostly, I like them because they're photos and photos last forever. They capture a moment, even if it is just you doin' the Miley tongue in your bathroom mirror. Seeing that photo forty years later might make you really happy, you never know. I think selfies are cool if you like taking them, and it's also okay if you don't because whatever, you know? I feel like a lot of people are going to read this and be like, "Wow Jenelle, this is a pretty trivial thing to write about." I'm pretty good at predicting arguments before they come at me, huh? Do you see a trend here? I come prepared for war. Anyways, to you, I say, yeah it is trivial. What's even more trivial is the fact that I feel like I have to defend myself because of this. I like my own face, so kill me, you know? Is it that threatening for a person to be confident in their appearance?  Basically, I wrote this to say that I don't think people should be able to dictate each others' choices. If you must, if you hate selfies too much to even think about them as real things, use this as a metaphor. Another example could be if someone didn't ever tie their shoelaces. If you're friends with this person, you're gonna see their shoelaces a lot, and sure, it might irritate you but it isn't hurting you and that's the way they like to wear their shoes, so it's not your place to say anything. Have your opinions but apply them to yourself and the way you live your life, not to the way others live theirs. If you didn't like this post, I'm not sorry because it was fun to write and I'm just too empty of emotion to care. Enjoy selfies if you want, and feel free to put twelve fucking filters on your next one if you want to because it's your decision. That's all I have to say. Goodnight. 

Why I'm A Soon-To-Be University Dropout.

     Okay, here we go. At the moment, I'm sitting in a Second Cup. I came here because I find it impossible to do homework without people watching me. I'm not motivated to do things on my own, and I figure if I slack off and people are around and I imagine these people thinking, "Man, that girl is really not doing her homework like she's supposed to be doing...", it'll make me feel more inclined to actually do work. This peer pressure study scheme that I've created for myself has failed, friends. And it's not because all of these people around me aren't scary, it's because I hate school. I don't hate school completely, but at this point in my life, what I'm doing right now is not good for me and it's driving me up the wall.
     On New Years Eve, I decided that this was going to be my last semester. That made me really excited because I figured in this semester I would just try to have a lot of fun and not be stressed out, and that seems reasonable, right? Just taking classes that I like solely for the purpose of learning and nothing else. So, I loaded up my course schedule with English, Women's Studies, Philosophy, Classics, and History of Western Music. The first day of classes, I dropped the Western Music class because the textbook was $170 (!!!!%%&$*#&@&$#*). I didn't even go to the class one time. The next day, I dropped Philosophy because my professor was like, "You'll need to have a handle on basic high school algebra" and I was like, "Kay, see ya". A week later, I dropped my Classics course because my prof was the most boring speaker I've ever heard in my life. I know he's probably incredibly intelligent and a really cool guy, but it just didn't work for me. So here I am now - down to two classes, a part-time student. You think it'd be a walk in the park, right? For the most part, it is. I go to class (most of the time) and I take notes on the things I'm supposed to take notes on and I do my assignments the way my profs want me to do them, and a lot of the time I really do enjoy the content. I like listening to these people who have years of experience in their fields tell me about all of these really cool facts, and different ways to read, and think and all of that. It's really nice to see people who are passionate about what they do. I love professors. They're neat people. But on another level, it makes me that much more upset about the fact that I have no idea what I'm doing there. My whole "this semester is going to be fun because I'm not working towards anything la la la" attitude has turned into an existential "why am I wasting my youth on sitting and digesting the stuff this corporation of an institution wants me to learn, I'm just paying them to be miserable, basically" attitude. What I'm angry about, if you didn't catch on in that last sentence, is the institution - the school itself. I've mentioned this briefly before but I never really got into exactly what I don't like about it. Let me enlighten you and get super personal (is it possible to get more personal?? Why am I telling you everything???). I received a loan from the government of Alberta for $13,000 dollars to live and go to school over this past year. I did it because I thought I would love university, I thought I would stay, and I thought it would be worth it. I loved high school, and loving university is what I was supposed to do, right? Not included in this loan were textbook costs. Overall, I think I spent about $600 on textbooks. Dropping all of those classes really helped me out though. Getting back $200 from this place that I hate was like a dream come true. So anyways, my point is, here I am in this Second Cup, worried about even buying a cup of coffee because that's how "in the hole" I am financially, and this school that's given me mostly stress and bad feelings is taking my money without batting an eye. It doesn't seem fair to me and it makes me upset.
     Now, before you get all frustrated with me because I'm just doing a lot of bitching, I want to say something. Firstly, I am so lucky to live in a place in the world where I am able to go to school and get an education. The freedom for people to choose to do that is something that I really value. It's just not for me, personally. Secondly, if you like school, I am so happy for you. If you fit in there and you feel like you're getting a lot out of your classes and you are just in love with every building you go to class in and you want to set up a tent in the hallway you love it so much, I am so, so, so happy for you. That's what everyone should feel - like they're spending their time on something that truly means something to them. If you can afford to go to school - hell, if you can't afford to go to school - and you are legitimately happy being there, fucking stay. Stay and be smart and be you and just have fun. All I'm saying is that this doesn't work for me. And honestly, after I spewed all of that anti-capitalist hate garbage (lawl), I'm not even as bitter about it as I seem, believe it or not. I'm glad that I know now, you know? If I never went to school at all, I would have always wondered, "Hmmm, what would a 300-level Philosophy class be like?" Now, that I've been to school, I know that it's full of computer scientists who just love math and that's cool. But it's not for me, and because I tried it out, I know that.
     In summary, the school I've been going to doesn't work for me because I feel like I should be doing something better with my time if I'm not sure about this right now. So, I'm going to finish off this semester and try to get the most out of it that I possibly can, I'm going to work my ass off this summer, and then travel. The way I see it is I could stay in school and learn how I'm supposed to be living, or I could just actually go out and live.
     I hope that this post spoke to you if you're unhappy with the institution you're currently stuck in. Even if you are happy with the institution you are in (again, I'm so happy for you), maybe this will help you understand why a lot of the people who started school at the same time you did aren't there anymore. Every one is different and every one needs different things. If you're happy where you are, stay there. If you aren't, get the fuck out and try something else. The only thing holding you back is yourself and I've experienced that first-hand. Always exercise your talents and always do what feels best for you, not what feels best for your parents or friends who think you should be doing something else. If you want to rip me to pieces for this post and tell me I'm an ungrateful first-worlder, feel free because I probably am. I just want people to acknowledge their feelings about where they are in their lives and follow them. That is fucking cheesy of me to say. But it works! I've acknowledged that I hate school and I feel light as a feather. Give it a shot and ask yourself if you're happy. It'll pay off. Ew, a money pun.

Another Essay For The Masses.

     I am emerging from the bat cave to say hello to the internet for a young minute. Hello, internet. This blog has turned into one of those things that I wish I had time for, and then I realize I do have time for it, and then I just get mad that I've kind of let it go to shit. Like, how you feel about cleaning your room, kind of. The last post I made was an assignment that I did for school, and guess what this post is? Bingo! An assignment I did for school. I like posting assignments because I feel like I'm defying the system a little. I hate the whole educational institute and what it does to peoples' brains. Most of the time, the majority of what school is is people who are really intelligent being taught how to be taught, you feel me? Creativity goes out the window and you end up writing papers based on a format that your teacher likes, erasing your ability to compile thoughts in your own way, and where does that leave you? Yes, with good marks, but also with a hollowed out creative mind and soul that should be filled with unique ideas and ways of doing things that make sense to YOU, not to your teacher. The reason I like posting my assignments is because I feel like I'm pretty good at doing what teachers like but within that, I'm always trying to find a way to write about things that I care about and that expand my creative and critical mind. So! This assignment is for my Women's and Gender Studies class. We were asked to analyze a TED talk, pick a specific part of the talk that stood out to us, explain what we think about it and argue why we're right. If you haven't seen this TED talk, I'm gonna post it right NOW:

http://youtu.be/VAJ-5J21Rd0

 

     So, watch it and then maybe finish reading this post, if you want! I think there are a lot of ideas that are really important to think about, even if you don't necessarily agree. Also, if you want to brutally criticize my essay, feel free! I'll write another post soon, hopefully. My essay is right below this. Thanks!

 

 

Deconstructing Boxes: Challenging Societal Norms and Binaries in iO Tillet Wright’s “Fifty Shades of Gay”

              

In every day situations, people are constantly faced with societal dichotomies. Be it black or white, small or big, his or her; the list goes on. The world is full of mutually exclusive binaries that force people to make a decision to be one or the other, but not both. In her TED talk, “Fifty Shades of Gay”, iO Tillet Wright explains how harmful polarization can be in all aspects of life, but most prominently for her, in terms of sexuality - the division between gay and straight in the United States specifically. Wright explores the limitations that come from placing people in boxes instead of allowing them to decide whether or not they would prefer to be in these boxes, in between these boxes, or maybe not be involved with these boxes at all. Putting people in boxes based on such a small part of their character (e.g. sexuality) is incredibly harmful and dangerous, can change their lives in drastic ways, and make them feel as if they do not belong.

               Labelling people based on gender and sexuality starts at an early age and, in most cases, carries on through adulthood. To begin her TED talk, Wright tells the audience about her childhood. She starts by telling the audience that when she was six years-old, “[she] decided that [she] wanted to be a boy” (Wright). Wright also tells of her very “sheltered” childhood in which she was never “asked to define [herself] as any one thing at any point” (Wright). From the way Wright speaks about her childhood, it is obvious that she feels very positively about the way she was raised. Her disagreement with boxes and labels most likely stemmed from having such an open and accepting childhood where she was never judged or expected to be anything that she did not want to be. She then goes on to explain how through her adolescence, she “wanted to be a girl again” and throughout her life continued to change and grow (Wright). Unlike Wright though, most children are labelled based on a socially constructed binary as soon as they leave the womb. Because of this, their freedom of expression is immediately limited. It is easy to see this in examples such as toys made for girls and toys made for boys. Girls receive pink, easy to use, non-challenging, soft things to play with, whereas boys are expected to play with cars, enjoy loud things, be masculine, and build things from the time they are five years-old. It is obvious that there are limitations to the growth of children when they are expected to grow up in such a structured way. Wright’s example of a more accepting and open childhood virtually eliminates expectation and the harm that stems from such an oppositional system.

               This gender binary ultimately leads to current gender theory: the expectation of masculine male humans to desire women and feminine female humans to desire men. This model continues to limit the way that people are allowed to feel in society, and further proves that a system full of dichotomies is not getting the human race any further in terms of freedom. Wright explains that “today in 29 states, more than half of this country, you can be legally fired just for your sexuality” (Wright). This example of one of the limitations of the gay/straight binary is enough evidence of a civil rights injustice to prove that a change needs to take place. If a person identifies as straight, they are automatically granted with basic human rights; the right to get married, the right to adopt children, the right to have a job at a certain place of work, etc. If a person identifies as gay though, these rights may be taken from their hands, and this is not just. Wright highlights the fact that, on the spectrum of straight to gay, most people sit somewhere in the middle. She asks, “Where exactly does one become a second-class citizen?” (Wright). If there are no boxes of gay or straight, which is what Wright is trying to accomplish, it’s hard to draw a definite line between who should be given certain rights and who shouldn’t. If there are no boxes and only a wide spectrum of people with certain experiences, heterosexual and homosexual, and everything in between, it is virtually impossible to discriminate because everyone is on the same level.

               Through the words of iO Tillet Wright, America has been exposed to a mindless dichotomy that has grown more and more prevalent throughout history. In language, on sports teams, on washroom signs, there is an ever present voice in peoples’ ears telling them to make decisions; to define where they fit and have society judge whether they are normal or abnormal based on these decisions. Erasing these clearly defined ideas about what is socially acceptable and what is socially deviant, as Wright is explaining, will give humans the freedom to define themselves on their own terms or not at all. Polarizations in all facets of life are just ideas constructed by a society that has grown accustomed to being uncomfortable with things and people that they have never seen or experienced before. These ideas have been constructed by humans, and can be just as easily deconstructed and remodeled by humans to include all people in all of their ways of being instead of only giving them a few choices and expecting that to be enough. There is far more to people than the boxes that society puts them in and when individual people become more important than these labels, freedom and equality will be that much closer.